the pregnancy story - pt II

i don't exactly remember the conversation after the we got the test results, but i know we decided we weren't going to have a wedding after all. although we wanted it, we figured even a moderate wedding was going to cost about $10k & now we had a baby on the way & we'd need that $10k just for diapers.

then we had to figure out how to let the cat out of the bag. a couple members of my family knew we'd eloped, so the announcement wouldn't be such a big deal there, but B's family was a different story. B had kept our elopement a secret because he didn't want to take away from our real wedding & that now wasn't going to happen. we also had a friend that had recently gotten pregnant, announced it to the world & miscarried in her first trimester. so for the most part, we decided to keep my pregnancy news on the downlow.

i did call my mom right away though: "hey mom, remember how we had that appt to go try on wedding gowns? yeah, i had to cancel that because we're not going to have a wedding after all. i'm pregnant." [i'm all about finesse] mom was THRILLED. [i found out much later she had already been secretly stockpiling baby stuff!]

i called my dr's office to get that ball rolling & the nerve of them, they didn't have an appt for me that very day. not even the next day. i thought for sure they needed to check my little baby out post haste - wtf? i was appalled! what kind of ob/gyn was this guy? cells were splitting & multiplying & dna code was being replicated, he was supposed to make sure all this was happening properly!!!

i felt fine though, happy that i hadn't experienced ANY morning sickness at all. the only thing was that enormous shrink in my stomach size. i normally would only eat 2 large meals, now i could only eat a little at a time but still had to eat enough to keep up with my outrageous metabolism & have some for baby.

a few days later i went to see the dr, he did an ultrasound & confirmed i was carrying a little bean. he gave me a prescription for some pregnancy vitamins & iron tablets & sent me on my way. that was it. i don't know why but i expected more, a fricken miracle was happening, i was carrying a baby & to him it was old hat.

oh yeah, & the most important part - my due date was june 16th & we knew B was scheduled to go to japan leaving sometime in june or july. awesome, i was going to have a baby & he was going to leave me alone to figure it all out by myself. i know the circumstances were completely out of his control & he wasn't leaving by choice, but try & explain that to a pregnant woman. it doesn't compute. even when she's only a few weeks pregnant.

i was mad. so, so mad & there was nothing i could do about it.