Monday, December 21, 2009

fa la la la la shit

3 week anniversary past yesterday. yes, i was completely aware of the day, but for the most part i was able to push it out of my head. but then, i saw the postman drop something off at the door & when i looked, it was from my mother -> she mailed Z's christmas gift.

so i guess that means she's not coming over for christmas....
& probably doesn't want to celebrate her 60th birthday a week later.

i haven't bought a christmas present for her yet. i try to think of something she would like, but am unable to. when i'm out shopping, i look for stuff for her, but nothing feels right. i don't think i can buy anything until i'm in a better place about the situation & i'm not sure what that's going to take. i was feeling somewhat better about it, but then the box arrived & made it new all over again.

the simple fact that she won't tell me what's going on makes me think that whatever is wrong, what ever i did, was really nothing, but something she's completely, absolutely blew out of proportion to epic dimensions in her head....


  1. get her a gift, get z's gift from her, hop in the car, drive to her house, knock on the door (covering the peephole, of course), when she answers the door say "your grandson wants to see you for christmas" and then just walk in.

    sounds like a good plan IN MY HEAD! i'm sure its not as easy as that though for you. i can only hope things are better soon.

    love you guys!

  2. well, i may be wrong, bc on one hand i do see taking Z would soften the situation; however i prefer he wasn't present for the evolution that's bound to occur.

    and again, i may be wrong here, but she's the one who can't talk to me, i think going over there will only exacerbate her feelings.

    the best thing for me to do is honor her request & leave her alone. this is what she does, it's just never been stated or to this degree.


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