how our morning went

i got up & got in the shower
B got up & got in the shower
i went to wake up Z
Z goes & sits on the toilet, then as i'm dressing he hollars "i have a bloody nose"
so i tell him to get some paper & to lay down, but then i see he's still sitting on the toilet
i go back to dressing then Z says "i got poop on the rug"

ugh...what? how did that happen? (B laughing in the background)
somehow the nosebleed distracted Z from his original reason for being on the toilet & he forgot to wipe his bottom.

so B tells me "see you will never understand boys"

YEAH, like that's a bad thing? you want/expect me to understand forgetting to wipe poop off your butt & not realize it until you've sat somewhere else & smeared it all over?

so Z gets up & wipes his bottom, but i don't know has problems & ends up with poop all over his hand & B is just laughing his ass off, while i'm getting more & more perplexed. why does poop removal have to be this difficult?

would someone please tell me?

i give Z more paper & tell him to clean, he cleans his hands not his bottom & but then out of nowhere he pulls a piece of toilet paper from his bottom...more hysterical laughter from B.

yeah, i don't get it, i don't know that i ever will.