June 2012

The boy finished 4th grade with a bang. Um, a good one not a bad one, clarification totally necessary for this kid.

Mrs Y was awesome for Z, exactly what he needed - tough but loving, fair & from what we could tell, did not play favorites. Z would play his games, check his boundaries, but between Mrs Y, BFF (the VP) & B the little one didn't get away with much. lots of growing up was to be had for Z, he did well academically & socially.

although we didn't get the results until right before school started for the state testing, Z missed only 1 on the entire math section & was above average for his english/reading/writing/literature/whatever it was.  the intelligence is there, it's the behavior & self control that limit him.  i think Z even surprised himself at his achievement.

B finished another semester in nursing school, one year down!

nothing to report for me, same old routine.

& there it was Christmas

you know what?  i'm finally, kinda sorta, almost, got this whole christmas thing down.

ok, i was still doing some last minute shopping on christmas eve, but still it wasn't as crazy last minute as years past.  ugh, does that mean i truly am getting old?  never mind, i don't want to talk about it.

although we initially planned to just give Z $100 & call it good this year (beings last year was the worst christmas ever bc he only got 12 presents - omg what a deprived child he is!!!), we couldn't help ourselves.  we picked up a few things here, a few things there, on & on until wait a minute, we're not giving him $100 too!!!

i got up early in the morning, made some coffee & called my mom over.  yes, we're talking again, um, we weren't talking for awhile [again], her game, not mine, not sure where the blog left off.  anyways, yes, talking & she nice even, which is a bonus.  she came over to watch Z open presents & hang out for a couple of hours, then she was off to work.  the visit was good, so i have no complaints.

Z made out like a bandit.  he played skylander giants, put together some lego bits, we played battleship, checked out his microscope & that was only like 1/2 the score.  i'm going to see muse in jan, so i'm a happy camper & B, well, i got him a jacket that i think he likes & a phone case that didn't fit, so that's still in the works...

but nobody cried.

May 2012

I forget what April was for but there was a lot going on in May.

The boy turned 10yo. Yes, really he did.

We had a little party at the house, but nothing to big as we were on our way to Hawaii. Yeah, how many people get that for a 10th birthday?

We did the total tourist route from going to a Lilo & Stitch luau to the Polynesian cultural center.  I took a mini hula lesson & failed miserably (no bouncing in hula, it's all side to side & I got too much ghetto in me).  C showed us Chinatown that was walking distance from her apt & we ate at a shrimp truck up near the North shore. For Z's birthday we went on a submarine ride that was awesome. We saw turtles, rays & a shark!  C took us to a few sacred places, on a hike here & there, we're probably cursed for trespassing...

Upon our return at like 1am on Sunday we were all beyond exhausted & unfortunately had to hit the ground running the next day.  Our return flight was delayed, the shuttle to our car was late, the onramp to the freeway was closed...murphy's law at it's best.

I'd missed only 4 days from work, but that included timesheets so I returned to chaos.  Although I was distracted all day by the constant hoping Z was having a good day & I wouldn't get a phone call from my BFF.  He made it though & Momma was oh so happy!

Lost but Found

The other day I decided to make some ciabatta bread. I looked in my recipe box, wasn't there; checked computer bookmarks, not there either; then in a back corner of my cobweb filled brain I remembered.

I used to have it together. There was a time when things were put in there place. That place was my blog.

I looked & yes, the post, the crumb & recipe were easily located. More importantly, I ached for how much I miss writing, documenting the craziness of life, my blog world of friends (real & imaginary).

My last post was in March, that's a lot of catching up to, it's been a long, rough year. Time passes no matter what though. I've spent the past few days working on posting from my phone. I don't know that I can do back links & other cool stuff, but I'm going to make a real effort to do this. It was good for me, made me happy, helped me see & get over the not so easy parts of life.

Missing you,
Me

on ice

we went ice skating with the cub scout group.  we had been told of the outing weeks in advance & i was SO excited!  um, Z was like whatever.  i remember going ice skating once before when i was a kid, little, parents still married even.  for some reason i thought i would be able to just glide out on the ice like dorothy hamill, not my fault girl made it look so easy.

i looked it up, it was the olympics of 76, so i was about 5 years old.  i fell a lot.  i cried a lot.  then i said it was bull**** & i was done with it.  [it really wouldn't surprise me if i said that, just so you know.]  i remember my parents trying to goad me out to there again but i wasn't having any more of it.

flash forward many years & now that i have roller skating & roller blade experience under my belt, i was eager to try again.  we were a little late, which you know, is what we do, so there were a few people there already giving it a whirl.  beings it was a group of newbies they rented "EZ skaters" - walkers for ice skating for all intentional purposes.

Z borrowed one of those & headed out w/B while i held on to the rail for dear life.  although B hadn't ice skated in a long time, it didn't take him long to get it back.  Z was out there, fast, it didn't matter how many times he fell he just kept on going & before we knew it he'd kicked that EZ skater to the curb & was falling all about without it, but that still didn't stop him.

i got going, finally able to let go of that rail a bit as it was quite similar to roller blading.  my calves would get sore really quickly though.  i could do 2 laps then i needed a break.  B tried coming along with me, but i couldn't hold his hand & skate, i needed to be on my own.  the only problem was i didn't learn to stop, which can be troublesome.  i little boy fell down in front of me & all i could do was yell to warn him of my eminent crash.  B said i actually called out his name, i have no recollection of that, but he was right behind me & he grabbed a hold of my waist & slowed me down some so i didn't completely run over the little one.

it was a good time, although Z fell numerous times he didn't complain.  i figured out i couldn't watch either B or Z skate as i would need heart medication.  we'll put that one down as a win & hope to do it again soon.

B's birthday weekend & another haircut story bc it's about that time of year....

B's mom & step dad came out for a visit for B's birthday.  they arrived on weds, so B & the boy were able to drive down to the airport to pick them up in the afternoon.  i didn't get to spend much time with everyone except for dinners, where we all ate like cavemen.

i don't remember what all it consisted of, but yeah, no vegetarians in this house.  then for B's birthday, one of his classmates gave us coupons to a local casino's seafood buffet.  yeah, let's gorge some more.  Z ate plates & plate of crab legs, then a couple of deserts, then 2 MORE plates of crab legs.  i was worried he might get sick on the drive home, he was fine though.

so on to the haircut story shall we?
one night Z's in the shower & mom-in-law says something about him taking a long time in there.  i didn't really think much of it, but the next morning when i went to shave my legs i noticed the blade was on backwards.  i'm not very smart so it took awhile for me to make the leap that the boy had been in the shower the night before.

alone with a razor.
& m-i-l had noticed he'd taken some time.

when Z got up i asked him if he'd used my razor & he said yes, he'd given himself a haircut in the shower.  that he thought of shaving his arms & legs too, but decided against it.  so i asked where? how? did he "give himself a haircut in the shower?" & he showed me [without the blade] how he shaved one side of his head, then the other, then the back.

the sides didn't show any obvious damage, the back however was shaved down to the skin.  it was not a good haircut.  B's first instinct was to shave his head completely, but the boy is much to light to sport that 'do.  so for a couple of weeks we just let it be & the long hair for the most part covered up the bald spot.

the cereal standoff

so the boy has graduated from the smaller bowls to regular size cereal bowls, the problem is he FILLS the bowl & then throws half of it away.  there is no pour 1/2 to 3/4 of a bowl & if he's still hungry pour more, no, no, no, it's all or none, don't want to waste that bowl space.

he's overfilled the bowl repeatedly & we have not been able to figure out a way to get him stop; no talk, no reasoning, no threats, nada.  finally one day i told him if he poured that much & put milk on it, he'd better eat it all, he continued on with is bowl of shredded wheat & so the day began.

he said he would eat it, but i knew it was too much.  i told him to put it in the fridge to keep in cold & to not let it sit very long bc the longer it sat the worse it would be.  i thought in an hour or so he would eat it, but he didn't.  lunch time came & went, the cereal was not eaten.  the day continued & it was time to get ready for a cub scout meeting but i told him he had to eat before we went, eat the cereal.  i was not going to let him gorge on snacks & treats without eating that darn bowl of cereal.

he refused, we didn't go to the meeting & the battle of the wills continued...
even B was impressed i hadn't folded by this time.

a couple of hours later he brought out the bowl, he tasted it & said it was gross.  surprise.  it took some time, but he did finally eat it.  i felt bad, but the line had been drawn in the sand & i had to stand my ground with him.  i know it seems harsh & ridiculous to have to do things this way, but honestly it made a difference.  he's gotten better with listening to me & he's definitely more mindful about wasting food.

Z deoderant & the oh shit story

one day at the end of the school day Z's hair was jacked up.  it wasn't cut [been there, done that], but it was all a mess.  i asked him maybe the girls had been playing & fixing up each others' hair, then they got a hold of him; nope that wasn't it.  then he explained to me that he'd been hot the day before so this morning he'd put underarm deodorant on his head....

******************

the other day we went for one heck of a walk, actually it was a hike, 2 hours & miles do not equal a walk. anyways at the end of it B & I were in a heap, so we stopped at the park on the way home & Z ran into a couple of friends & played kickball.  [really, does he have to rub in all that darn energy?]

anyways, so Z kicks the ball & his shoe falls of & he says "oh shit!".  the were a ways of, so i asked B "did he just say that?" & B said "yes he did".  we let him play for a bit then we called the boy over & asked him about it.
B asked him where he heard it? - "from a movie/tv/whatever" [good answer]
Has he ever heard us say it? - "yes" [surprise]
Who says it more - "Poppa" [YES! & proof that he doesn't listen to a word i say....]

******************

the other day at target or walmart, Z & I were near the feminine hygiene area.  thankfully, i've managed to steer clear of this discussion for some time.  i always remember that was a signal of "it's time to no longer bring the boy into the lady's restroom with you" after the time he asked me about the tampon dispenser.  i told him it didn't have any candy btw.....

then there has been an occasional question at home but easily answered with "be happy you're a boy & you don't need to know anything about this."  however, this time at the store, he pointed to a box of pads & then he smiled funny so i asked him what that was about & he told me he knew what they were for & he pointed to the right area.  i left it at that.

Z updates bc we're so overdue for one....

well, let's see....right before christmas break, Z got in trouble at school & had it not been for that holiday, i'm pretty sure the teacher would have called us in for a talk.  luckily the break calmed & cleared everyone's head, i guess a 3 weeks will do that for you....thankfully.

Z got his 1st pair of glasses over the break, when he returned to school, his teacher even moved him from the front & center spot.  while i'm sure part of that was someone else was more deserving of her attn, it was good that it wasn't Z, even if only for a moment.

he did get a progress report; still not showing his work, not listening, not performing up to his abilities & behind in his AR testing.  [read child of B, not mine]

about week ago or so, the calls started up again.  i'm sure at least a part of it has something to do with B's new class schedule; 3 times a week Z goes to school before 8, when on regular days, he gets up at 8.  in this aspect the boy is like momma & he needs his sleep, lots & lots of it.  on the days B doesn't have school, he's had the chance to go in & talk with teacher, so we're working together.

again the boy is not showing his work, but one day when his teacher asked him why he didn't he told her "bc i don't want to" in front of the entire class, so he was sent to the principal's office.  he also went to the responsibility room where he did no work.  the spiral downward continued, bc that's what Z does.  i'm hoping he hit rock bottom & we're bouncing back, we'll see....

so we had an anniversary

yes, we did!

neighbor J watched the boy & although I wasn't feeling that great B had made reservations at that little french restaurant we used to go to a long time ago.  i was so glad considering recent economic times this place was still around.  B got the fish bc he's the chick & i got the beef wellington, cuz i'm the dude.  B wanted to go to the movies afterwards to watch "the vow" but i didn't want to rush dinner nor did i want to watch a sappy movie that was going to make me cry....[see chick/dude references].

it was nice to sit & have a relaxing dinner, the restaurant is not one to feed you & push you out the door.  B also noticed we were probably the youngest people in the restaurant & joked that we got the kiddie table.  we sat & talked for a bit after eating & although we'd decided to go to a coffeeshop, in my delirium i ordered tea so B got his espresso there.  I shouldn't be allowed to talk when i'm in that state.

B also got me some purdy roses, the yellow ones with the orange tips & a nice card.

the next evening Z asked if he could eat the left over b.wellington i brought home.  beings i wasn't feeling well the night before i didn't want to eat very much as it's quite rich.  Z didn't care for it, the meat was too rare, but beings it was there on the counter i tasted it again.  wow, was it ever good, yes, i had ordered it med-rare, but even re-heated it was still pretty red, so i understood why the boy didn't care for it.  however, it made me realize how off i was the night before.

i missed getting a card for B for our anniversary, but i got him one for valentine's day.  i didn't get a card for valentine's though, not that it was a big deal, more something we laughed about.  he did actually tell me when i was going to the store that if i wanted a card, i needed to buy one for myself.  i think i owe myself some valentine's day shoes or purse though...

we camped again

not in the snow, with cubs scouts & even better with M & little one!

unfortunately B's school got all stupid & instead of getting out of class at 4, he was there until 7 then when he got home we still have to throw all our camping stuff in the back of the truck, go pick up another CS family that had issues, then pick up some drive thru dinner & drive ~2 hours to the middle of the desert.

thankfully we gave a friend our tent, so at least that was setup but it was 10 or 11pm when we finally got to our spot. we unloaded the necessities, were told to keep food in the vehicle bc there were desert rats out there, then we hit the hay. i was exhausted at work before all this, add the wind noise & attack of the rabid desert rats & i did not sleep all night no matter how tired i was.

the next morning kiddos were up at sunrise squealing & screeching & making all kinds of horrible sounds, happy sounds, but awful to someone who was now feeling rather zombish. we had some sort of breakfast that included a cup of sausage links & bagels [no cream cheese, see roughing it!]. i wandered over & found M's campsite with her own private potty! we had to share; with a lot of people, it was a hike from the campsite & it was stinky!

in the afternoon we took a hike into the nothingness & found an oasis; it was beautiful & surprising to find. the boys had activities & after dinner B & I went to hang w/M for the evening. we had a bit to drink & talked, but we were all exhausted & thought it was at least 10pm only to discover it was like 7:30, talk about lightweights. getting up so early plus the sun going down so quickly really messed up our clocks

before we left camp we asked Z if he wanted to come with us but he wanted to stay with the kids.  when we returned, he said he didn't know where we were....bc we often just disappear like that.  they were playing around the campfire then the kid got all kinds of attitude & we had to go have a talk in the tent.  i'm sure he was just all kinds of tired, but really tired mommy wasn't having it.

the next morning we had breakfast & a nice little prayer ceremony, then it was time to pack it up.  we headed back over to visit M & little one for a bit before we got on the road.  on our way home we missed our turn & ended up driving through julian.

being i started the trip exhausted, then didn't sleep one night, i was out of it for an entire week.  the princess needs a bed & warmth & no rats...
oh, i forgot to mention that someone did have a rat enter their tent in the night!

the birthday that wasn't

during christmas break i had mentioned to Z that Grammie's birthday was coming up.  i had agonized over what to do, how to handle the situation, but yet i still wanted him to express birthday wishes to her.  so on one of trips to target he asked if he could pick out a birthday card for her.  the card he chose had some dinosaurs on the front & inside is said:

HEY REMEMBER US?

i about fell over in the aisle laughing so hard.  Z didn't understand & i needed to explain to him that although i thought the card was HILARIOUS, Grammie wouldn't like it, that really it would hurt her feelings [no matter how true it was], so he picked out a normal happy birthday card.

also during the break & before the actual birthday Z wrote a letter to Grammie.  he talked about how he missed her & how he would like to go spend the weekend with her & then he asked why she wasn't talking to us.

yeah......it gets better

it was part of a cub scout assignment & he wanted to really mail it to her.

...[no words]

there wasn't really anything i could say, so he addressed it & mail it off.

the letter was mailed before the birthday card & i waited on pins & needles for the call that i knew was inevitable.  she called one day when i wasn't feeling well & was sleeping.  when i called her back she said she was calling to speak with Z about the letter he wrote her.  although she didn't say the words, it was obvious she didn't want to speak with me.

i really, really don't get how she still wanted to continue this.  i told her we needed to talk about things.  it took some effort but then she finally let it out that she was mad about 4th of july weekend, that S "took priority" but she refused to admit the real reason was she that she was upset that Z didn't want to go spend the weekend with her.

then she went on to say that she was hurt bc i didn't go over on my birthday.  um, remember the call i got?  welcoming right?  she said she wanted me to know she was mad at me...well, gee, isn't that the BEST way to wish someone a happy birthday & invite them over for cake????

so i don't know that we really got anywhere but we did talk & then i let her talk with Z.  oh, i did tell her that Z wouldn't be going to stay with her until we worked things out [including B] & that she needed to ask us before asking him over.  that's mainly bc she doesn't take our schedule, his cub scout activities or when he's on restriction into any consideration & we have to drop off & pick up on her schedule.

she talked with Z for a bit & when he brought me the phone he was saying "ok, i'll check with my mom if i can go stay with you next weekend".....so what, 12 seconds later she's doing it again?

her birthday was a few days later.  i called her & wished her a happy birthday & we talked for a few minutes, then i let Z talk with her.

holiday break

so i'm new working in a school environment thing, so i didn't know i was going to get the week between christmas & new year off.  when i figured it out, we tried to plan to go somewhere but it was too late, too expensive to reserve anything during that time.

B & Z went up to ghetto house for a couple of days when i was still working.  well, not the house itself, but up to visit R.  during the week off Z & I were sick with a cold; we tried taking it easy thinking that would nip it in the bud.  Z did eventually get better, i didn't.  i also didn't make it to the budz annual christmas party, which was such a bummer.

for new years we went to our neighbor's condo in oceanside.  i really, (ok, REALLY) was thinking of backing out, but decided i needed to quite being such a stick in the mud & do SOMETHING.  i was glad i went, that we went.  we went to the condo's game room & not that there was much, but there was a foozeball table (i'm the worst foozeball player in the world, weakest wrists ever!) & a pool table (yeah, i suck at that too).

Z had a good time playing foozeball though as he was better than me & you know that's all that matters.  pool was really fun though, i probably haven't played (more than a game or two at least) since B & I met.  however, i used to play often with the guys from work & some other friends.  funny thing is B also used to play quite a bit before we met as well.  Z hadn't played & he got in a few good shots & at one point B said i broke a few laws of physics when i got 2 balls in with 1 shot.  i think i broke more than that....

so now we need a full size pool table ;-p

when we came home S was here waiting for us; we stayed up & rang in the west coast new year.  i don't remember what we did the rest of the weekend.  oh, i know at some point we worked in the yard & we built L-dog a fab house.

i need to blog more, i can't remember shit.