during christmas break i had mentioned to Z that Grammie's birthday was coming up. i had agonized over what to do, how to handle the situation, but yet i still wanted him to express birthday wishes to her. so on one of trips to target he asked if he could pick out a birthday card for her. the card he chose had some dinosaurs on the front & inside is said:
HEY REMEMBER US?
i about fell over in the aisle laughing so hard. Z didn't understand & i needed to explain to him that although i thought the card was HILARIOUS, Grammie wouldn't like it, that really it would hurt her feelings [no matter how true it was], so he picked out a normal happy birthday card.
also during the break & before the actual birthday Z wrote a letter to Grammie. he talked about how he missed her & how he would like to go spend the weekend with her & then he asked why she wasn't talking to us.
yeah......it gets better
it was part of a cub scout assignment & he wanted to really mail it to her.
there wasn't really anything i could say, so he addressed it & mail it off.
the letter was mailed before the birthday card & i waited on pins & needles for the call that i knew was inevitable. she called one day when i wasn't feeling well & was sleeping. when i called her back she said she was calling to speak with Z about the letter he wrote her. although she didn't say the words, it was obvious she didn't want to speak with me.
i really, really don't get how she still wanted to continue this. i told her we needed to talk about things. it took some effort but then she finally let it out that she was mad about 4th of july weekend, that S "took priority" but she refused to admit the real reason was she that she was upset that Z didn't want to go spend the weekend with her.
then she went on to say that she was hurt bc i didn't go over on my birthday. um, remember the call i got? welcoming right? she said she wanted me to know she was mad at me...well, gee, isn't that the BEST way to wish someone a happy birthday & invite them over for cake????
so i don't know that we really got anywhere but we did talk & then i let her talk with Z. oh, i did tell her that Z wouldn't be going to stay with her until we worked things out [including B] & that she needed to ask us before asking him over. that's mainly bc she doesn't take our schedule, his cub scout activities or when he's on restriction into any consideration & we have to drop off & pick up on her schedule.
she talked with Z for a bit & when he brought me the phone he was saying "ok, i'll check with my mom if i can go stay with you next weekend".....so what, 12 seconds later she's doing it again?
her birthday was a few days later. i called her & wished her a happy birthday & we talked for a few minutes, then i let Z talk with her.