Z explosion

although it was a working friday, it was a rather easy week & day. Z went to his buddy's (J) house for the day so when i got off work i went home changed into shorts, asked B to look up movie times, then headed over to pick up the little one.

when i got there he didn't say hello or acknowledge my arrival in any way. when J's mom tried to talk to him he ignored her. when J tried to talk to him he responded w/"none of your business". i told him he needed to apologize to buddy not realizing the tantrum under surface just waiting for the right moment.

i told him a few times we needed to get going & kinda delayed it a bit by talking w/J's mom. then finally when i said it really was time to go he completely exploded. yelling at me that it was all my fault, that he hated me, that didn't love me, that i was mean, that he wasn't my friend. the only thing that was missing were the flying fists.

i was horrified, every single cell of my body was embarrassed. if there was some way i could have crawled inside myself & disappeared, i needed it to happen at that point. i knew he was so out of control the last thing he needed was me to yell at him, so i some how managed to talk to him in a soft voice & tried to get him to calm down.

meanwhile i had J, his mom & little sister on the opposite side of the room watching everything unfold, i couldn't even look at them when i turned around nor did i want to see the look on their faces. when we left J's mom made sure to tell me he had behaved very well the entire day.

on the 3 block drive home Z continued to argue so by the time we arrived he worked up 25 min in timeout (we dole out in 5 min increments). after that B sat down & talked w/him & finally Z apologized; it was weak & forced.
i told B i didn't understand his lack of remorse.