Wednesday, July 28, 2010

spider in my face

GAH how i wish i was joking....

i don't think i've talked about this before, but i'm pretty girlie when it comes to spiders, um, bugs, uh, creepy crawly type things...yeah ALL OF THEM!!! that's why i don't camp...

but growing up in a testosterone free house i didn't think much about killing a bug or spider, it's what you do. it wasn't until i was in my early 20s & i was visiting a friend in her new apt & there was a spider & she flung a magazine at it & i sat back & wondered what the heck she was thinking. i mean that's not how you go about killing something. she told me her dad always done the killing, so although she was a few years older than me she was helpless.

in our house, Z calls me when he finds a bug or spider. B will usually just leave it, he knows it drives me crazy. i don't mess around, a shoe or something hard, preferably not my hand, but sometimes i don't have time. [yeah i KNOW how disgusting that is & i totally remember being a kid & nana smushing roaches with her hand & wondering how in the world she could do that!!! but honestly time is of essence & you CAN wash your hand or would you prefer the bug to continue existing in your home?]

anyways, self proclaimed bug fanatic, the other day i woke up with a couple of bites on my legs. B thought I'd gotten bitten working in the yard, but i said no, i was pretty sure something got me in bed. so i washed the sheets & blanket, vaccuumed around & under the bed & even sprayed the room some.

that was a few days ago.

last night just after 2am i was dreaming i was in this large building searching throughout various hallways for some large charting analysis papers, large 2X3s like maps, by someone named Mitzsomethingjapanese & the files began under series 1100something [can someone please tell me WHY i can remember stupid details to dreams but reality is all soft & fuzzy?]



i felt something on my forehead!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i reached up with my left hand, grabbed, smushed & threw all in one motion.

then i laid there for a few minutes trying to figure out if the shit crawling on my forehead was real or not.


i was pretty sure it was so i got up & turned on the bathroom light & looked around the floor. although it took a bit i found the dark spot in the carpet & grabbed a tissue & got it.

it's f-ing huge!


& it was on my face!

i sat there & stared at it while it moved about a bit, dying, as i'd ripped out 3 of it's legs. once i felt comfortable that it was dead enough i grabbed a small glass from the kitchen & put it over it & i stared at it for sometime. i couldn't stand it so then i went & looked it up, exactly what i needed, to look at spider pictures.

i think it's a grass spider which is harmless, but i prefer him dead.
than alive.
on my face.
in my bed.

B made fun of me bc i have him under glass but i told him the glass isn't for the spider, it's for me, for my own peace of mind. i slept with the light on last night & today i vacuumed again, but i found a web between the wall & mattress by my pillow that wasn't there a few days ago.

so my nightly routine will now include a mattress inspection with a chancla [that'd be flip flop to non-spanish speaking folk] in hand.

oh & needless to say i've been jumpy all day the middle of the day Z & i were in the backyard & something big came flying at me, i didn't even see it, i just heard it's engine & i totally screamed out! B asked if i was ok & i told him a helicopter bug was after me. then in the evening when Z & i went for a walk i heard something in the bushes & a bunny popped out. A BUNNY! & i screamed like it was a rabid animal coming to eat me!

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