The boy finished 4th grade with a bang. Um, a good one not a bad one, clarification totally necessary for this kid.
Mrs Y was awesome for Z, exactly what he needed - tough but loving, fair & from what we could tell, did not play favorites. Z would play his games, check his boundaries, but between Mrs Y, BFF (the VP) & B the little one didn't get away with much. lots of growing up was to be had for Z, he did well academically & socially.
although we didn't get the results until right before school started for the state testing, Z missed only 1 on the entire math section & was above average for his english/reading/writing/literature/whatever it was. the intelligence is there, it's the behavior & self control that limit him. i think Z even surprised himself at his achievement.
B finished another semester in nursing school, one year down!
nothing to report for me, same old routine.
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Friday, December 28, 2012
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
the work
do you have any idea how great it's been to not be looking for a job?
to not search all the job boards & stalk all the company websites & more importantly not live on shoestring budget?
granted i'm not making much, but it is an income & it's great to have one again.
so the other day, out of the blue, one of my co-workers asks me if i'd like to come work at her husband's office.
run the place.
twice the pay.
seriously.
gah...
oh, one more thing, fridays off, yeah 4 day work week!
where was this job last year?
i thought about it, went back & forth, talked with B about it... but i think i'm happy where i'm at, for now at least. i need training wheels, after 2 years of not working i've really lost my touch. plus i don't have a commute & my boss doesn't think anything of it
probably though, the biggest thing is that my boss isn't an ass. it's funny, a few people have said a few things about him, but honestly after working for old boss, this guy is easy.
granted i'm not making much, but it is an income & it's great to have one again.
so the other day, out of the blue, one of my co-workers asks me if i'd like to come work at her husband's office.
run the place.
twice the pay.
seriously.
gah...
oh, one more thing, fridays off, yeah 4 day work week!
where was this job last year?
i thought about it, went back & forth, talked with B about it... but i think i'm happy where i'm at, for now at least. i need training wheels, after 2 years of not working i've really lost my touch. plus i don't have a commute & my boss doesn't think anything of it
probably though, the biggest thing is that my boss isn't an ass. it's funny, a few people have said a few things about him, but honestly after working for old boss, this guy is easy.
Friday, November 18, 2011
turkey nightmares
so i'm getting into my groove at work [translates to i'm discovering my mistakes], so that's good, i guess. funny that boss doesn't say anything to me though, just lets me mess things up. oh well, i actually learn best that way & possibly, what's really scary, is that he knows that.
now that i'm a real employee, i'm on probation.....for a year....so much for feeling all comfy.
i already had to turn in my first self evaluation. it was fun.
when boss sent it over to me he actually told me "don't be too hard on yourself".
SEE? he knows me, i don't need anyone to tell me what a f-up i am....my mother taught me well dammit!
so far the hardest thing for me to do was thanksgiving. really, one wouldn't think so, but for me, it was. first i had to figure out where to get the turkeys from & that's actually more difficult than i expected. we don't have ovens, so i needed a hot, cooked turkey & really, not an easy task....well, factor in that it needs to be cheap too & that we were feeding between 40-50 people.
i finally found a place, but then i had to wait for boss to tell me it was ok to order & i needed $$ to pay for it & that was the part that was killing me. yes, i know he was busy with important things, but dang, i honestly was having nightmares about the thankgiving potluck & no flipping turkey & my ass was fired. part of that was bc in prep for the potluck i don't know how many of the guys told me "that's not how blahblah predecessor did it" so in the end i would just tell them i wasn't her.....
we got turkeys ordered & i felt the weight lifted from my shoulders, it was great.
then i realized i had to decorate, which is so not my forte.
i went out to the room, pulled out the previous years decorations & ended up with a headache. i went back to the office & pitifully asked a coworker to help me & she was awesome! she moved the tables around so people could sit across from each other & put tablecloths up so they looked like drapes & all kinds of cute little things. every once in awhile she would ask me "what do you think about this?" & i was at a loss.....yeah, i failed decorating in chick school.
the potluck went well, i could hardly eat though. afterwards we cleaned it all up & i was so relieved it was all over.....then later i realized christmas is next.....let the ham nightmares begin.
now that i'm a real employee, i'm on probation.....for a year....so much for feeling all comfy.
i already had to turn in my first self evaluation. it was fun.
when boss sent it over to me he actually told me "don't be too hard on yourself".
SEE? he knows me, i don't need anyone to tell me what a f-up i am....my mother taught me well dammit!
so far the hardest thing for me to do was thanksgiving. really, one wouldn't think so, but for me, it was. first i had to figure out where to get the turkeys from & that's actually more difficult than i expected. we don't have ovens, so i needed a hot, cooked turkey & really, not an easy task....well, factor in that it needs to be cheap too & that we were feeding between 40-50 people.
i finally found a place, but then i had to wait for boss to tell me it was ok to order & i needed $$ to pay for it & that was the part that was killing me. yes, i know he was busy with important things, but dang, i honestly was having nightmares about the thankgiving potluck & no flipping turkey & my ass was fired. part of that was bc in prep for the potluck i don't know how many of the guys told me "that's not how blahblah predecessor did it" so in the end i would just tell them i wasn't her.....
we got turkeys ordered & i felt the weight lifted from my shoulders, it was great.
then i realized i had to decorate, which is so not my forte.
i went out to the room, pulled out the previous years decorations & ended up with a headache. i went back to the office & pitifully asked a coworker to help me & she was awesome! she moved the tables around so people could sit across from each other & put tablecloths up so they looked like drapes & all kinds of cute little things. every once in awhile she would ask me "what do you think about this?" & i was at a loss.....yeah, i failed decorating in chick school.
the potluck went well, i could hardly eat though. afterwards we cleaned it all up & i was so relieved it was all over.....then later i realized christmas is next.....let the ham nightmares begin.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
finally
i'm back, i know, it's been way too long...
work was kicking my butt, i was completely exhausted all the time, plenty of nights i was going to bed at 8:30. then the laptop up & died, without a cursory blue screen of death....i got vertical lines of color & the screen went out. luckily, i was able to get all my bookmarks & thankfully i didn't keep anything on there before it was gone.
Z's been busy with school. i almost am afraid to say it, but my bff hasn't called lately. although Z did get a red card the other (which really, who cares if bff doesn't call, i'm good). he started guitar lessons a few weeks ago; he goes back & forth between liking it & not....because he actually has to practice. he's also still doing the cub scout thing, but along the same lines, he's not all that into it other than going to the meetings, he's not down with extra effort. reports cards are coming out soon, i don't think anyone around here is looking forward to that.
B's also been busy doing his nursing thing. thankfully his class load isn't too heavy, but he's about to start his clinicals soon, so that will be interesting. they actually went to check things out last week & the entire class got stuck in the parking lot elevator....for an hour. glad i wasn't there, i would most surely have to pee or something.
i think i've gotten into the swing of things with working. one day i forgot to put on anti-antiperspirant...while it was still very summer. another day i forgot to brush my teeth. seriously! how could i, clean teeth freak forget i really don't know! what's worse, i couldn't come home at lunch to brush them. so i used wet paper towels to rub them a little, chewed several pieces of gum & popped breath mints, often & managed to survive the day.
my mom still isn't talking to me.
i miss nana like crazy still, her birthday back in september was a rough day.
work was kicking my butt, i was completely exhausted all the time, plenty of nights i was going to bed at 8:30. then the laptop up & died, without a cursory blue screen of death....i got vertical lines of color & the screen went out. luckily, i was able to get all my bookmarks & thankfully i didn't keep anything on there before it was gone.
Z's been busy with school. i almost am afraid to say it, but my bff hasn't called lately. although Z did get a red card the other (which really, who cares if bff doesn't call, i'm good). he started guitar lessons a few weeks ago; he goes back & forth between liking it & not....because he actually has to practice. he's also still doing the cub scout thing, but along the same lines, he's not all that into it other than going to the meetings, he's not down with extra effort. reports cards are coming out soon, i don't think anyone around here is looking forward to that.
B's also been busy doing his nursing thing. thankfully his class load isn't too heavy, but he's about to start his clinicals soon, so that will be interesting. they actually went to check things out last week & the entire class got stuck in the parking lot elevator....for an hour. glad i wasn't there, i would most surely have to pee or something.
i think i've gotten into the swing of things with working. one day i forgot to put on anti-antiperspirant...while it was still very summer. another day i forgot to brush my teeth. seriously! how could i, clean teeth freak forget i really don't know! what's worse, i couldn't come home at lunch to brush them. so i used wet paper towels to rub them a little, chewed several pieces of gum & popped breath mints, often & managed to survive the day.
my mom still isn't talking to me.
i miss nana like crazy still, her birthday back in september was a rough day.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
the interview
my job listing did come up, i applied & later received a notice from HR that my salary requirements exceeded the position. they provided a range & said if i didn't reply accepting it, i would be dropped from the pool. i contacted F that night & asked if this was negotiable. i had put a salary higher than what i was currently making bc i thought it was standard practice to negotiate during the interview process, in addition i'm not taking their medical benefits which are a large portion of their package.
F did speak with me the following am & explained his hands were tied by HR, but there were other things he could do. that was good enough for me so i replied to the message.
F & i interviewed the other day & even though i know him, i was still nervous & uncomfortable. the HR guy was part of the interview process as well & he had 3 pages of questions. F asked him if we really had to do all that? if we had to ask all the questions? there were moments that were easy, but there was a question i choked on & F had to lead me to an answer.
as far as i know he didn't interview anyone else for the job (a benefit of calendar management) & i forgot to ask when they would be making a decision (mainly bc i did so poorly on the interview).
i don't know why i was so nervous, but i was & i was so mad at myself later i ended up with a headache.
good thing my boss likes me!
F did speak with me the following am & explained his hands were tied by HR, but there were other things he could do. that was good enough for me so i replied to the message.
F & i interviewed the other day & even though i know him, i was still nervous & uncomfortable. the HR guy was part of the interview process as well & he had 3 pages of questions. F asked him if we really had to do all that? if we had to ask all the questions? there were moments that were easy, but there was a question i choked on & F had to lead me to an answer.
as far as i know he didn't interview anyone else for the job (a benefit of calendar management) & i forgot to ask when they would be making a decision (mainly bc i did so poorly on the interview).
i don't know why i was so nervous, but i was & i was so mad at myself later i ended up with a headache.
good thing my boss likes me!
Sunday, August 14, 2011
working girl
my first day of work was 7/19 after not working for just over 2 years. to say the least, working a 40 hour week kicked my butt...big time. i think i'm in pretty decent shape but everything would hurt, i was exhausted every day & the weekends were for sleeping/recovering. ridiculous, but part of it was i wasn't used to wearing shoes anymore, much less heels. i know, talk about uncivilized....
when i walked into the office in was in the middle of a remodel, my office had been boxed up which i worked at for a couple of days & i had a student assistant who'd been there for a whole 3 weeks. that was my training. i was in another office for a few weeks, next to E & mainly assisted him.
my boss, F, came in to the office once a week. i wasn't exactly sure of him. i told B he was very hard to read & i really didn't know if he liked me or not, then B suggested he possibly felt the same way about me, which actually comforted me.
as soon as he was able to F had me moved back to my desk, up in front, alone, but more importantly away from E. my student assistant had moved on as the summer was over & 2 assistants for the fall were coming in as i began unpacking the crap that was to be my office.
i couldn't believe the amount of boxes that were supposed to fit in there. i unpacked & tried to make sense of things, then i unpacked more & then i couldn't do anymore. i would have the student unload a box & i would grow through it bit by bit, it was painful how much crap had been saved. the position had been held by 3 or 4 people previously & nobody threw out a damn thing throughout those 20 years. at one point i thought i was actually going to cry i was so overwhelmed by it all, but then i thought about how once i knew it was all shit i could throw it away & i was ok.
everytime F would come in he would say something about "there's still boxes in there." he didn't know how badly i wanted to put a match to all of it. there was at least 5 different files for the same thing; one person was highly organized, she had a green hanging file then a thick folder file to hold one page, or to hold a few empty forms.....from 10 years ago. the latest person had most of her file labels written by hand, scribbled "SSN" or "osha", very professional.
my first day F did tell me the permanent position would be listed & he wanted me to apply for it. it took several weeks, it finally listed & i applied. not right away as i had to update my resume & work on some things to say i actually had experience in them.
when i walked into the office in was in the middle of a remodel, my office had been boxed up which i worked at for a couple of days & i had a student assistant who'd been there for a whole 3 weeks. that was my training. i was in another office for a few weeks, next to E & mainly assisted him.
my boss, F, came in to the office once a week. i wasn't exactly sure of him. i told B he was very hard to read & i really didn't know if he liked me or not, then B suggested he possibly felt the same way about me, which actually comforted me.
as soon as he was able to F had me moved back to my desk, up in front, alone, but more importantly away from E. my student assistant had moved on as the summer was over & 2 assistants for the fall were coming in as i began unpacking the crap that was to be my office.
i couldn't believe the amount of boxes that were supposed to fit in there. i unpacked & tried to make sense of things, then i unpacked more & then i couldn't do anymore. i would have the student unload a box & i would grow through it bit by bit, it was painful how much crap had been saved. the position had been held by 3 or 4 people previously & nobody threw out a damn thing throughout those 20 years. at one point i thought i was actually going to cry i was so overwhelmed by it all, but then i thought about how once i knew it was all shit i could throw it away & i was ok.
everytime F would come in he would say something about "there's still boxes in there." he didn't know how badly i wanted to put a match to all of it. there was at least 5 different files for the same thing; one person was highly organized, she had a green hanging file then a thick folder file to hold one page, or to hold a few empty forms.....from 10 years ago. the latest person had most of her file labels written by hand, scribbled "SSN" or "osha", very professional.
my first day F did tell me the permanent position would be listed & he wanted me to apply for it. it took several weeks, it finally listed & i applied. not right away as i had to update my resume & work on some things to say i actually had experience in them.
Monday, July 18, 2011
how to one up that walmart interview
E made it sound like i would be working the following week, but after the interview i didn't hear anything. i went to vegas & tried not to dwell on it; then i called B & asked him what he thought i should do, i'm always hesitant to put myself out there like that. he thought it would be better for me to call & ask about it, that it was unlikely to turn out bad.
so i did.
i called E from a hotel bathroom in vegas.
alone at least, no strippers or midgets....
i left a message asking what was the status of the position beings i hadn't heard anything after the interview. within a couple of hours i received a call from HR offering me the position.
with a bit of a raise!
i started the following tuesday!
it's my alma matter & where B's going to nursing school!
oh, & get this:
friday july 1st - B found out he was accepted into the nursing program, i received a check from my uncle thanking me for taking care of nana & i got the walmart interview call.
friday july 15th - i got the walmart interview job, S & M both won some $ in vegas.
nothing special happened on the 29th, but we're good!
so i did.
i called E from a hotel bathroom in vegas.
alone at least, no strippers or midgets....
i left a message asking what was the status of the position beings i hadn't heard anything after the interview. within a couple of hours i received a call from HR offering me the position.
with a bit of a raise!
i started the following tuesday!
it's my alma matter & where B's going to nursing school!
oh, & get this:
friday july 1st - B found out he was accepted into the nursing program, i received a check from my uncle thanking me for taking care of nana & i got the walmart interview call.
friday july 15th - i got the walmart interview job, S & M both won some $ in vegas.
nothing special happened on the 29th, but we're good!
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
the walmart interview
i don't like to say too much about the job searching endeavors, it's boring to me, why would anyone else want to read it? also i'm afraid of jinxing myself...but this one's kinda weird so i'm sharing:
anyways, as you can guess, the search continues. the last interview i talked about [here] i surprisingly got a call back & went in for a real interview. all went well, they said they would be in touch soon, the HR chick emailed me within a couple of days saying they still hadn't made a decision & then zip. dead in the water. i even emailed HR chick back & didn't get a response.
i went on another interview last week & didn't get that job either. however, the HR lady did call me to let me know she was impressed with my resume & said i interviewed very well, then she gave me some tips on applying for other positions with the company. they hired someone who'd previously worked in the dept & although i need a job, it was something i wouldn't enjoy although i probably would have taken it if offered.
then on friday, before a 3-day 4th of july holiday weekend mind you, about 4:30pm while were out running errands my phone rings. i've been sending out resumes all over the place, but my first assumption is it's about Z.
it wasn't about Z.
it was E.
i thought it was rather presumptuous of him but he didn't ask if it was a good time for me. it was hot & i'm in a walmart parking lot & really, you want to talk about work?
he did.
he needed someone right away, someone to start supporting one of his underlings, then transition over to him. we talked about my experience, he ran a full impromptu interview & he told me he was going on vacation the following week. he said HR would check my references & if i didn't hear from them or him on tuesday to call him.
it was kinda crazy.
i got online to check my references bc i wasn't sure whom i had put down but i couldn't access that part of my profile.
about 3pm on tues i got a little nervous beings i hadn't heard anything from anyone, so i called & left a vm for E & within an hour i received a call from HR to schedule an interview.
the next morning i interviewed with 2 people. it was strange, their first question was why did i apply & how was i qualified for the position? haha, ummmmmm, i didn't apply, i got a call from E.....it was a bit awkward to say the least....
so i fumbled some & went on to explain my work experience hoping that would work. i got a somewhat better understanding of the position. it reports to interview guy for 3 months while some transitions go on, there was no talk of E or his position.
later in the evening i received a call from HR that they needed references, so there wasn't a place to input them on the profile & i don't have any listed on my resume. i provided the information, then the next day they called back bc they needed supervisors, not coworkers. so that's done & now i wait.
anyways, as you can guess, the search continues. the last interview i talked about [here] i surprisingly got a call back & went in for a real interview. all went well, they said they would be in touch soon, the HR chick emailed me within a couple of days saying they still hadn't made a decision & then zip. dead in the water. i even emailed HR chick back & didn't get a response.
i went on another interview last week & didn't get that job either. however, the HR lady did call me to let me know she was impressed with my resume & said i interviewed very well, then she gave me some tips on applying for other positions with the company. they hired someone who'd previously worked in the dept & although i need a job, it was something i wouldn't enjoy although i probably would have taken it if offered.
then on friday, before a 3-day 4th of july holiday weekend mind you, about 4:30pm while were out running errands my phone rings. i've been sending out resumes all over the place, but my first assumption is it's about Z.
it wasn't about Z.
it was E.
i thought it was rather presumptuous of him but he didn't ask if it was a good time for me. it was hot & i'm in a walmart parking lot & really, you want to talk about work?
he did.
he needed someone right away, someone to start supporting one of his underlings, then transition over to him. we talked about my experience, he ran a full impromptu interview & he told me he was going on vacation the following week. he said HR would check my references & if i didn't hear from them or him on tuesday to call him.
it was kinda crazy.
i got online to check my references bc i wasn't sure whom i had put down but i couldn't access that part of my profile.
about 3pm on tues i got a little nervous beings i hadn't heard anything from anyone, so i called & left a vm for E & within an hour i received a call from HR to schedule an interview.
the next morning i interviewed with 2 people. it was strange, their first question was why did i apply & how was i qualified for the position? haha, ummmmmm, i didn't apply, i got a call from E.....it was a bit awkward to say the least....
so i fumbled some & went on to explain my work experience hoping that would work. i got a somewhat better understanding of the position. it reports to interview guy for 3 months while some transitions go on, there was no talk of E or his position.
later in the evening i received a call from HR that they needed references, so there wasn't a place to input them on the profile & i don't have any listed on my resume. i provided the information, then the next day they called back bc they needed supervisors, not coworkers. so that's done & now i wait.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
not working
so, work, um, yeah......
i did get a letter regarding this interview & they selected another candidate. a good call i admit, call me for something else though.
i went on another interview the monday before nana's services. yeah, it wasn't easy to push everything aside, put on a happy face, answer questions & be sparkly. sparkly is difficult for me under normal circumstances, it's just not me, recent events made this a real feat. i thought everything went well, the job & company sounded good, the pay was less than what i wanted, but it was a job. a week later i received notice they'd hired someone else.
that hit hurt.
i also received 2 letters from the city that although i met their minimum requirements for 2 office clerk positions there were MANY other higher qualified candidates. 15+ years experience & a BS degree puts me at the bottom of the list? i guess they have MBA's doing their filing....
a few weeks ago i applied for a position at the jr college down the street & also tested for an office job with the county. this week i had 2 phone interviews (same company).
i haven't had a chance to write about what happened with my mom yesterday, but bc of it i had a really hard time sleeping last night. the 2nd interview was this morning. i was nervous, i talked too fast, my voice wasn't right & i kept clearing my throat to no avail. i really have no clue what the interviewer thought of me, she did say that a lot of my skills history aligned with what they were looking for but she didn't say anything about contacting me again for followup.
nana, Z, my dad, my mom....
today i say f-it,
i've had enough people.
i did get a letter regarding this interview & they selected another candidate. a good call i admit, call me for something else though.
i went on another interview the monday before nana's services. yeah, it wasn't easy to push everything aside, put on a happy face, answer questions & be sparkly. sparkly is difficult for me under normal circumstances, it's just not me, recent events made this a real feat. i thought everything went well, the job & company sounded good, the pay was less than what i wanted, but it was a job. a week later i received notice they'd hired someone else.
that hit hurt.
i also received 2 letters from the city that although i met their minimum requirements for 2 office clerk positions there were MANY other higher qualified candidates. 15+ years experience & a BS degree puts me at the bottom of the list? i guess they have MBA's doing their filing....
a few weeks ago i applied for a position at the jr college down the street & also tested for an office job with the county. this week i had 2 phone interviews (same company).
i haven't had a chance to write about what happened with my mom yesterday, but bc of it i had a really hard time sleeping last night. the 2nd interview was this morning. i was nervous, i talked too fast, my voice wasn't right & i kept clearing my throat to no avail. i really have no clue what the interviewer thought of me, she did say that a lot of my skills history aligned with what they were looking for but she didn't say anything about contacting me again for followup.
nana, Z, my dad, my mom....
today i say f-it,
i've had enough people.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
the decline begins
on the 7th nana had a dr appt, i didn't go bc my mom came over.
2 things came of the appt - dr put nana on morphine (i'm not sure if that's good or bad, it was mainly to ease her stomach pain, but morphine's some scary shit) & bc there hadn't been changes in her health instead of 4 weeks her next appt was 6 weeks (win!).
i don't remember what happened, but i didn't see nana until monday & she was a MESS. (oh, i had received a call from the facility over the weekend letting me know they had reduced the morphine pills 2/day to 1.) she laid in bed in agonizing pain, it hurt to see her like that. she was so out of it, not drugged, just could not see beyond the pain to see me or acknowledge anything.
i put her flowers on the windowsill like i normally do so they could get some sun & gave them some water from a cup. i didn't realize it until i had already emptied the cup that it was vomit. i was already teary & queasy, seeing that didn't help. a lady from the church came in to see nana's roomie, when she saw me she asked if i wanted her to pray for nana & i said yes.
i talked with the nurses & my uncle & everyone said it was the medication transition, but it seemed like much more to me, but what do i know....
i've been back to see her, more than usual, she's improved some, but nowhere near where she was before the appt. i don't know if it's the morphine or if the tumor has become active.
it's taken some arm twisting but my uncle is finally on-board with getting hospice involved. i'd hoped beings he contact the dr's office to inquire about the hospice he'd let them know about nana's declining health but he didn't. i don't know what he's waiting for, but i know i'm always half-sprung & looking for something to obsess over. this is most definitely it.
well, the job thing too, but i'm not getting into that now. that's another corner of this blog & my brain....
we're almost to the year on my dad's passing, the timing has me worried.
2 things came of the appt - dr put nana on morphine (i'm not sure if that's good or bad, it was mainly to ease her stomach pain, but morphine's some scary shit) & bc there hadn't been changes in her health instead of 4 weeks her next appt was 6 weeks (win!).
i don't remember what happened, but i didn't see nana until monday & she was a MESS. (oh, i had received a call from the facility over the weekend letting me know they had reduced the morphine pills 2/day to 1.) she laid in bed in agonizing pain, it hurt to see her like that. she was so out of it, not drugged, just could not see beyond the pain to see me or acknowledge anything.
i put her flowers on the windowsill like i normally do so they could get some sun & gave them some water from a cup. i didn't realize it until i had already emptied the cup that it was vomit. i was already teary & queasy, seeing that didn't help. a lady from the church came in to see nana's roomie, when she saw me she asked if i wanted her to pray for nana & i said yes.
i talked with the nurses & my uncle & everyone said it was the medication transition, but it seemed like much more to me, but what do i know....
i've been back to see her, more than usual, she's improved some, but nowhere near where she was before the appt. i don't know if it's the morphine or if the tumor has become active.
it's taken some arm twisting but my uncle is finally on-board with getting hospice involved. i'd hoped beings he contact the dr's office to inquire about the hospice he'd let them know about nana's declining health but he didn't. i don't know what he's waiting for, but i know i'm always half-sprung & looking for something to obsess over. this is most definitely it.
well, the job thing too, but i'm not getting into that now. that's another corner of this blog & my brain....
we're almost to the year on my dad's passing, the timing has me worried.
Thursday, March 24, 2011
dreaming
i haven't written any dream posts in some time...
last night, i don't remember any of the circumstances however the point of the dream was - a job will come when the time is right.
although i love staying home it's really is getting to me. the job market does seem to be opening up so i'm sending out more applications/resumes, but still minimal results. remember the interview? the following week i sent a followup email to the HR person & she said no decisions had been made but shortly thereafter i found the position listed again.
i went on another interview last week. the job description was mis-leading though, so during the HR interview everything i said i wanted was not what the job entailed. the interview with the hiring managers seemed ok, one hardly said anything besides "do you have any questions for us?" REPEATEDLY & the other one seemed uncomfortable speaking. anyways, it's a large company but working in a SMALL office & doing really basic office stuff so i hope they don't call me back unless it's for something else. i know that sounds bad coming from someone who's jonesing for a job, but i don't want to work somewhere that's going to drive me bonkers in 3 months.
oh wait, we were talking about dreams, darn tangents.....
last week i had 2 strange dreams, in the first one we (B & I) had a teenage daughter, she was pretty much Z with long hair & just as much attitude...possibly more. strike that, it was a nightmare not a dream.
the next day or so i dreamt that i woke up with grey/white hair. there were a few strands of brown in there, but i had to LOOK for them. it was ghastly! [yes, i do have dreams where i wake up, it's not unusual at all for me.]
then there's the crazy dream that actually occurred a few months ago but really stuck in my head [bc yes, it was that weird!] we had a dog, not sure if it was lady or not, but she was having puppies. the first one came out & we were holding it, looking at it, etc & not really paying attn to momma dog but kinda noticed that she was really working at birthing pup #2. some time passes before pup #2 arrives, only it's not a pup, it's a baby.
as in a human baby.
it was encased in some sort of embryonic sack that was very tight. i assumed, bc well, um, it was human & it's momma was a dog among other reasons, that it was stillborn, then i think i made a noise or something happened bc the baby opened it's eyes & looked directly at me. now, that sounds a little horror-movie-like, but in my dream i wanted that baby & there was no evilness.
i knew i had to open the sack so the baby could get oxygen. i grabbed at the film but there was no slack. i was pinching the baby's face through it trying to get a hold of some to rip it apart, then finally i was able get a little bit right between the eyes. i don't know if it was a boy or a girl, but i saved it.
last night, i don't remember any of the circumstances however the point of the dream was - a job will come when the time is right.
although i love staying home it's really is getting to me. the job market does seem to be opening up so i'm sending out more applications/resumes, but still minimal results. remember the interview? the following week i sent a followup email to the HR person & she said no decisions had been made but shortly thereafter i found the position listed again.
i went on another interview last week. the job description was mis-leading though, so during the HR interview everything i said i wanted was not what the job entailed. the interview with the hiring managers seemed ok, one hardly said anything besides "do you have any questions for us?" REPEATEDLY & the other one seemed uncomfortable speaking. anyways, it's a large company but working in a SMALL office & doing really basic office stuff so i hope they don't call me back unless it's for something else. i know that sounds bad coming from someone who's jonesing for a job, but i don't want to work somewhere that's going to drive me bonkers in 3 months.
oh wait, we were talking about dreams, darn tangents.....
last week i had 2 strange dreams, in the first one we (B & I) had a teenage daughter, she was pretty much Z with long hair & just as much attitude...possibly more. strike that, it was a nightmare not a dream.
the next day or so i dreamt that i woke up with grey/white hair. there were a few strands of brown in there, but i had to LOOK for them. it was ghastly! [yes, i do have dreams where i wake up, it's not unusual at all for me.]
then there's the crazy dream that actually occurred a few months ago but really stuck in my head [bc yes, it was that weird!] we had a dog, not sure if it was lady or not, but she was having puppies. the first one came out & we were holding it, looking at it, etc & not really paying attn to momma dog but kinda noticed that she was really working at birthing pup #2. some time passes before pup #2 arrives, only it's not a pup, it's a baby.
as in a human baby.
it was encased in some sort of embryonic sack that was very tight. i assumed, bc well, um, it was human & it's momma was a dog among other reasons, that it was stillborn, then i think i made a noise or something happened bc the baby opened it's eyes & looked directly at me. now, that sounds a little horror-movie-like, but in my dream i wanted that baby & there was no evilness.
i knew i had to open the sack so the baby could get oxygen. i grabbed at the film but there was no slack. i was pinching the baby's face through it trying to get a hold of some to rip it apart, then finally i was able get a little bit right between the eyes. i don't know if it was a boy or a girl, but i saved it.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
oh how i wish
i just caught up on a few months worth of MODG's blog. not only have i not been blogging, i haven't been reading & i miss my internet friends SO much! i really need to get back to working where i can sit at the computer all day & get paid for surfing, those were the days....
i check in with crissy & tia once in awhile, but the last time i read MODG she was still preggers. now she has a cute little boy & it reminds me so much of baby days with Z. tia's pregnant now & i guess she's choosing to not turn into a mommy blogger bc she hasn't talked about her pregnancy much.
i would have totally blogged about my pregnancy had i known the blogging world existed. i really would have liked to have had the outlet, although it would not be something anyone else would want to read; at least not at that time, hindsight soften things. now looking back at that time i think i went through a sort of depression, similar to postpartum i guess, but during not after.
the first 8 weeks or so were fine other than the weird change in my appetite. you hear about women who can't eat very much later in their pregnancy bc the baby is so big, but for me this all started way early. it was a learning experience, i remember one time when i had reached about the 1/2-way point driving home i had to pull over to pick up some fast food. only that wasn't fast enough, i was so emotionally unbalanced i was about to cry bc i was hungry.
i kept telling myself "it's ok, i'm going to get food. don't cry all these people will look at me like i'm crazy. i don't even look pregnant. who cries when they're hungry?" my eyes actually watered when i got the food (from hunger & true relief) & it felt so good to eat but i could only eat 1/2 of a cheeseburger. yes, of course that other 1/2 went home with me.
i couldn't eat a lot at one setting, but i ate often, like every 2 hours or so. i started packing all kinds of snacks, little baggies full of food (dry cereal, various crackers, etc). i often thought my lunch bag was comparable to something herman munster would carry. i also kept a bag of jerky in the car for emergencies...that is until i turned into a vegetarian.
me, carnivore extraordinaire. in high school i used to wake up in the middle of the night & eat lunch meat or have a couple of bites of some kind of leftover meat bc my metabolism worked so fast. i did not waste time with carbs or veggies at that hour & now my body did not like meat. for probably about a month i couldn't eat meat; it felt way too heavy in my stomach & made it ache.
i also learned that i had a very low tolerance for sweets. early on B made a fruit smoothie for me, but i couldn't keep in down. i don't remember what other sweets i tried, but no ice cream for me during that time. my treat - yogurt. no, not even frozen yogurt, just plain ole out the fridge yogurt was my dessert or sweet treat.
at one point i counted & i had eaten 14 times in 1 day. i know that seems like a lot but i haven't mentioned the nausea, etc. my constant eating was actually what clued my co-workers onto my secret. one day one of the guys said "if i didn't know better i would say..." yeah, i was close to the 3 month marker, so i fessed up but asked him to keep it quiet until i was ready to make the announcement.
i check in with crissy & tia once in awhile, but the last time i read MODG she was still preggers. now she has a cute little boy & it reminds me so much of baby days with Z. tia's pregnant now & i guess she's choosing to not turn into a mommy blogger bc she hasn't talked about her pregnancy much.
i would have totally blogged about my pregnancy had i known the blogging world existed. i really would have liked to have had the outlet, although it would not be something anyone else would want to read; at least not at that time, hindsight soften things. now looking back at that time i think i went through a sort of depression, similar to postpartum i guess, but during not after.
the first 8 weeks or so were fine other than the weird change in my appetite. you hear about women who can't eat very much later in their pregnancy bc the baby is so big, but for me this all started way early. it was a learning experience, i remember one time when i had reached about the 1/2-way point driving home i had to pull over to pick up some fast food. only that wasn't fast enough, i was so emotionally unbalanced i was about to cry bc i was hungry.
i kept telling myself "it's ok, i'm going to get food. don't cry all these people will look at me like i'm crazy. i don't even look pregnant. who cries when they're hungry?" my eyes actually watered when i got the food (from hunger & true relief) & it felt so good to eat but i could only eat 1/2 of a cheeseburger. yes, of course that other 1/2 went home with me.
i couldn't eat a lot at one setting, but i ate often, like every 2 hours or so. i started packing all kinds of snacks, little baggies full of food (dry cereal, various crackers, etc). i often thought my lunch bag was comparable to something herman munster would carry. i also kept a bag of jerky in the car for emergencies...that is until i turned into a vegetarian.
me, carnivore extraordinaire. in high school i used to wake up in the middle of the night & eat lunch meat or have a couple of bites of some kind of leftover meat bc my metabolism worked so fast. i did not waste time with carbs or veggies at that hour & now my body did not like meat. for probably about a month i couldn't eat meat; it felt way too heavy in my stomach & made it ache.
i also learned that i had a very low tolerance for sweets. early on B made a fruit smoothie for me, but i couldn't keep in down. i don't remember what other sweets i tried, but no ice cream for me during that time. my treat - yogurt. no, not even frozen yogurt, just plain ole out the fridge yogurt was my dessert or sweet treat.
at one point i counted & i had eaten 14 times in 1 day. i know that seems like a lot but i haven't mentioned the nausea, etc. my constant eating was actually what clued my co-workers onto my secret. one day one of the guys said "if i didn't know better i would say..." yeah, i was close to the 3 month marker, so i fessed up but asked him to keep it quiet until i was ready to make the announcement.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
went on an interview
i finally, finally got a call back that actually led to an interview. i was beginning to think there was a subliminal message on my resume that said "don't call, don't hire, i have herpes".
although i didn't have a lot of experience in the area, it sounded like one of those jobs hardly anyone really knows going in, so the little knowledge i had was a good wedge to start with. within a couple of days of sending in my resume i received a call from HR & we did a little phone interview, then set up an in person one.
i discovered the company was small, which initially is something i didn't want, but at this point i'm not going to be that picky; especially bc the location is oh so close & the pay is decent. many of the jobs i've looked at have been right on the cusp of too far & for quite a pay cut. employers now want uber experience & pay junior salaries, it's not a great time to be looking for a job. i'm so thankful we've been able to make things work for this long.
at the sit down interview i first spoke with the HR person again. she told me they had done lots of interviews & she was tired of it all & hoping to hire someone right away, really like possibly within the next week or 2 is what it sounded like. all went well with her & then i interviewed with the hiring manager.
he was the nuts & bolts, he gave a huge list of requirements & responsibilities. i really don't know how things went with him. he gave me a different schedule, saying he wouldn't make any decisions until mid-month, then probably scheduling a 2nd round of interviews, with the new person probably starting at month end.
so i'm going to have to just wait & just keep swimming...[that's from nemo]
although i didn't have a lot of experience in the area, it sounded like one of those jobs hardly anyone really knows going in, so the little knowledge i had was a good wedge to start with. within a couple of days of sending in my resume i received a call from HR & we did a little phone interview, then set up an in person one.
i discovered the company was small, which initially is something i didn't want, but at this point i'm not going to be that picky; especially bc the location is oh so close & the pay is decent. many of the jobs i've looked at have been right on the cusp of too far & for quite a pay cut. employers now want uber experience & pay junior salaries, it's not a great time to be looking for a job. i'm so thankful we've been able to make things work for this long.
at the sit down interview i first spoke with the HR person again. she told me they had done lots of interviews & she was tired of it all & hoping to hire someone right away, really like possibly within the next week or 2 is what it sounded like. all went well with her & then i interviewed with the hiring manager.
he was the nuts & bolts, he gave a huge list of requirements & responsibilities. i really don't know how things went with him. he gave me a different schedule, saying he wouldn't make any decisions until mid-month, then probably scheduling a 2nd round of interviews, with the new person probably starting at month end.
so i'm going to have to just wait & just keep swimming...[that's from nemo]
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
not really working
in an attempt to get back into the work routine & soliciting myself to a few friends, i got a response. [i'm still not sure if i really wanted one, but whatev's....] i figured if nothing else, i could get used to doing something along the lines of my normal work instead of yard work, cooking & sewing [i got a few lessons for martha stewart these days].
so i'm helping an old friend from the dirt company. the co. shut it's doors about a year ago or so, everyone scattered & many made their own joint ventures trying to survive it all. this friend asked me to help him with reports & basically getting his office organized.
funny thing is he was one of the main reasons i stayed [& later left] that job. he was a good friend, but in the end i felt like he was taking advantage of me, his demands were more than i could handle at the time. i had wanted to leave that job so many times in the past but either he, or later it was B, would talk me out of it. in their defense i liked the work, the pay was good & i had flexible hours so i could go to school.
however i always remember from my interview day the vieja said "we're like a family here" which was true, it was extremely dysfunctional & everyone was ok with that.
when i finally did leave B was in Japan [& we didn't know when he was coming home], Z was 9 months old [i'd been a single parent for 8 months], i was exhausted from a hellacious commute [an hour+ each way, with a baby who tended to puke a lot] & i had been at a job for over 10 years which i'd hated for um, probably the entire time.
i didn't expect all that to unfold, but there it is...
so i've got more on my plate, but i'm not working, not really anyways. all the red tape & circumstances make it so it's best i don't get paid for my efforts. sigh....
so i'm helping an old friend from the dirt company. the co. shut it's doors about a year ago or so, everyone scattered & many made their own joint ventures trying to survive it all. this friend asked me to help him with reports & basically getting his office organized.
funny thing is he was one of the main reasons i stayed [& later left] that job. he was a good friend, but in the end i felt like he was taking advantage of me, his demands were more than i could handle at the time. i had wanted to leave that job so many times in the past but either he, or later it was B, would talk me out of it. in their defense i liked the work, the pay was good & i had flexible hours so i could go to school.
however i always remember from my interview day the vieja said "we're like a family here" which was true, it was extremely dysfunctional & everyone was ok with that.
when i finally did leave B was in Japan [& we didn't know when he was coming home], Z was 9 months old [i'd been a single parent for 8 months], i was exhausted from a hellacious commute [an hour+ each way, with a baby who tended to puke a lot] & i had been at a job for over 10 years which i'd hated for um, probably the entire time.
i didn't expect all that to unfold, but there it is...
so i've got more on my plate, but i'm not working, not really anyways. all the red tape & circumstances make it so it's best i don't get paid for my efforts. sigh....
Thursday, April 15, 2010
the interview
last week i went on an interview; one i didn't want to go on. i know that doesn't make sense, but i inadvertently applied for a position that was title 'finance blah' & in the fine print it said 'works with people'....uh, that's not me.
however, it's at a place that i want to work at, so i couldn't blow them off, i couldn't tell them i already had a job & i've already been told if i want in, i have to start at the bottom. which for the most part, i'd be willing to start pretty low but that whole havingtotalktopeople thing& they don't mean office gossip leaves a bad taste in my mouth.
so i went to the interview & of course bc i wasn't nervous i was awesome. [oh how i wish i could bottle that & save it for another time.] really, i was good, know how i know? bc yesterday they called to get approval before checking my references.
damn!
"so can we call f18 people?" - yes
"what about noems?" - um, yeah [this may be my way out, maybe old boss will give me a bad referral???? not likely, but maybe something will fall out of his mouth before he can stop himself, or his tone might say it all as well...come on old boss, bring it!!!!]
"the golf place?" - all my work peoples are gone, so not a very good source
oh, & there's more to the dislike part, it's a temporary job, only 10-12 weeks. i'm in the works about finding/figuring out how that affects my unemployment but as of right now, it's looking like not a good thing.
although i asked a string of questions trying to figure out how it would work i got one answer being "old claim would end, new claim would have to start". so a new claim based on a short work period at lower pay.
yah for me - as in who can screw things up beyond belief?
however, it's at a place that i want to work at, so i couldn't blow them off, i couldn't tell them i already had a job & i've already been told if i want in, i have to start at the bottom. which for the most part, i'd be willing to start pretty low but that whole havingtotalktopeople thing
so i went to the interview & of course bc i wasn't nervous i was awesome. [oh how i wish i could bottle that & save it for another time.] really, i was good, know how i know? bc yesterday they called to get approval before checking my references.
damn!
"so can we call f18 people?" - yes
"what about noems?" - um, yeah [this may be my way out, maybe old boss will give me a bad referral???? not likely, but maybe something will fall out of his mouth before he can stop himself, or his tone might say it all as well...come on old boss, bring it!!!!]
"the golf place?" - all my work peoples are gone, so not a very good source
oh, & there's more to the dislike part, it's a temporary job, only 10-12 weeks. i'm in the works about finding/figuring out how that affects my unemployment but as of right now, it's looking like not a good thing.
although i asked a string of questions trying to figure out how it would work i got one answer being "old claim would end, new claim would have to start". so a new claim based on a short work period at lower pay.
yah for me - as in who can screw things up beyond belief?
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
work stuff
[yeah, i know i'm unemployed & i'm writing about work...whatever]
i still talk with a few people from my old job, the woman they hired to replace me...well, 6 months later girlfriend still doesn't know word or excel.
my old officemate got tired of helping her over & over & i finally let have it & made her cry. which had to be quite a role reversal for officemate, as she was the emotional one & not that she needed help, but she was used to lots of free time [ie, not being the output lead].
even better, i found out old boss from previous job had to hire another person to run the office; not as in a 2nd replacement as in 2 people to the job. i bet he still thinks he overpaid me...
so i had a dream, before i found out about the 2nd replacement, that 1st replacement quit & i had to go back to work for old boss. i don't remember the details...i just remember being there & telling old boss that i didn't want to be there, that's why i quit before, that i was miserable there.
his response was "well she left & you know the job so i don't have to train anyone new so you have to stay".
GEEZ, i was HAPPY when i woke up!
i still talk with a few people from my old job, the woman they hired to replace me...well, 6 months later girlfriend still doesn't know word or excel.
my old officemate got tired of helping her over & over & i finally let have it & made her cry. which had to be quite a role reversal for officemate, as she was the emotional one & not that she needed help, but she was used to lots of free time [ie, not being the output lead].
even better, i found out old boss from previous job had to hire another person to run the office; not as in a 2nd replacement as in 2 people to the job. i bet he still thinks he overpaid me...
so i had a dream, before i found out about the 2nd replacement, that 1st replacement quit & i had to go back to work for old boss. i don't remember the details...i just remember being there & telling old boss that i didn't want to be there, that's why i quit before, that i was miserable there.
his response was "well she left & you know the job so i don't have to train anyone new so you have to stay".
GEEZ, i was HAPPY when i woke up!
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
the not-interview
it was a week ago, time flies people!!!!
he told me to just come in for a chat, so what i got from that was they didn't really have a position open, but possibly in the future, so a meet & greet of sorts, right?
so i get there, the office wasn't right at the street, but back in a little maze of buildings. i found the address, but there was no sign on the door (as in the company name). i kinda blew that off, during the phone conversation it sounded like they had just moved....then i try the door & it's locked.
i surmise 1-no sign on door + 2-locked door = 3-side door
there's a doorbell thingie, so i ring that & someone comes to the door & i say "oh i'm sorry is this not the front door, i'm here to meet so&so?" & get "no, this is the front door".
so i look around & there's a copy machine & stuff piled everywhere, not a front reception-like office by any stretch of the imagination. so&so comes out & greets me, then walks me down the hall to a conference room & there's more boxes & shit piled in the hallway so i say something about them just getting moved in & he says "no, the company has been here about 6 years" [open mouth, insert BIG foot] so i say "oh, i must have misunderstood you over the phone".
in talking with him though, i really would like the work, but it's a small company so they don't have all the benefits i want. i would be able to learn tons of skills that could get me where i want to go long term though. when i left there it sounded very plausible & we just needed to negotiate pay [which is always great fun]. during the not-interview he told me the anticipated salary range, but said he would work on getting more.
over the past week, i've been in a lot of drama [in addition to all the posts i've made i didn't even write about baby C going in for his monthly treatment & having a hpv spot deep down in his lungs...he's ok though], but so&so & i have been in contact via email, although i admit i haven't been very timely. i gave him some references, he asked me for a more definitive salary, i told him my ideal # + 401k matching + dental (they don't offer the 2 latter) & told him that was just a starting point. in response he gave me a HUGE list of qualifications (that i don't have) which he said were required to merit the pay i suggested....
HELLO? you're a mom & pop shop (~70 employees total spread out over 5 or so offices)....1/3 of the "required qualifications" aren't relevent to the company! it looks like a list directly copied from salary.com; so i think we are done with each other. i sent him an email yesterday & he hasn't responded, i kinda hope he doesn't. i think i was just excited about the possibility of a job. i try to tell myself not to get so worked about it, it's more about finding the right career, not just a paycheck. i'm enjoying my free time, when i left for the interview B told me "don't go!" (he likes it too); we prepared ourselves for down-time & we know how to buckle-up when income dips, so were not desperate...yet.
UPDATE - i received an email from so&so & he agreed we probably were not a good fit....so i'm off the hook!!!! is it strange that i'm happy & relieved about that?
he told me to just come in for a chat, so what i got from that was they didn't really have a position open, but possibly in the future, so a meet & greet of sorts, right?
so i get there, the office wasn't right at the street, but back in a little maze of buildings. i found the address, but there was no sign on the door (as in the company name). i kinda blew that off, during the phone conversation it sounded like they had just moved....then i try the door & it's locked.
i surmise 1-no sign on door + 2-locked door = 3-side door
there's a doorbell thingie, so i ring that & someone comes to the door & i say "oh i'm sorry is this not the front door, i'm here to meet so&so?" & get "no, this is the front door".
so i look around & there's a copy machine & stuff piled everywhere, not a front reception-like office by any stretch of the imagination. so&so comes out & greets me, then walks me down the hall to a conference room & there's more boxes & shit piled in the hallway so i say something about them just getting moved in & he says "no, the company has been here about 6 years" [open mouth, insert BIG foot] so i say "oh, i must have misunderstood you over the phone".
in talking with him though, i really would like the work, but it's a small company so they don't have all the benefits i want. i would be able to learn tons of skills that could get me where i want to go long term though. when i left there it sounded very plausible & we just needed to negotiate pay [which is always great fun]. during the not-interview he told me the anticipated salary range, but said he would work on getting more.
over the past week, i've been in a lot of drama [in addition to all the posts i've made i didn't even write about baby C going in for his monthly treatment & having a hpv spot deep down in his lungs...he's ok though], but so&so & i have been in contact via email, although i admit i haven't been very timely. i gave him some references, he asked me for a more definitive salary, i told him my ideal # + 401k matching + dental (they don't offer the 2 latter) & told him that was just a starting point. in response he gave me a HUGE list of qualifications (that i don't have) which he said were required to merit the pay i suggested....
HELLO? you're a mom & pop shop (~70 employees total spread out over 5 or so offices)....1/3 of the "required qualifications" aren't relevent to the company! it looks like a list directly copied from salary.com; so i think we are done with each other. i sent him an email yesterday & he hasn't responded, i kinda hope he doesn't. i think i was just excited about the possibility of a job. i try to tell myself not to get so worked about it, it's more about finding the right career, not just a paycheck. i'm enjoying my free time, when i left for the interview B told me "don't go!" (he likes it too); we prepared ourselves for down-time & we know how to buckle-up when income dips, so were not desperate...yet.
UPDATE - i received an email from so&so & he agreed we probably were not a good fit....so i'm off the hook!!!! is it strange that i'm happy & relieved about that?
Thursday, October 22, 2009
today, nana
today within a 1/2 hour timespan i got 3 phone calls.
i rarely get phone calls at all, to get 3 back to back was unusal.
the first call was from Z's school. i didn't talk about what happened before a few weeks ago. he wanted to play with a girl, she asked him to leave, he refused & punched her in the face. today he argued with another kid about who was first in line & when another girl backed up the other kid, Z spit in her face.
i don't know where or how my child thinks this behavior is acceptable. although i know i shouldn't worry about what people think, i wonder how many people are waiting for me to show up in jackie o sunglasses hiding a shiner? B actually explained to Z tonight about how he (B) doesn't speak to his own father, how he is such a mean person, how he hits people. this story is so old....
the 2nd call was a company i sent an unsolicted resume to. it's a company i worked with when i worked for old boss. i was torn when i sent the resume in the first place, do i want to work with a company that may have the same problems i had with old boss? i'm going in on tuesday "just to chat" not an official interview.
the 3rd actually came in during call 2, it was my mother. i called her back & she told me AO had called & told her nana was in the hospital & for me to call the hospital to see what i could find out. i called the hospital but they wouldn't tell me anything, but i did get to talk with my nana.
she sounded fine, she said her stomach was hurting, she hadn't eaten in 2 days, they were giving her a liquid through her veins & she may need surgery, but for now the pain was gone. i called my AO back, she said something about the possibility of stomach cancer & i got my uncle's number beings the hospital said my uncle was the point of contact. he confirmed the cancer, another biopsy had been done to determine what stage it's in, but the results weren't in yet.
i called my other uncle & he told me depending on the outcome of the biopsy, he wants to bring her to LA for better care. he also told me they (2 uncles) decided it's best to not tell nana she has cancer, they're afraid she'll give up. i think they may be right.
we are headed down tomorrow for my reunion. we planned on having lunch with nana on sat. i called her this morning & left a message that i'd call her back not knowing she was in the hospital. i was supposed to get the sewing machine she wanted me to have; now i feel as though it would be taking, stealing, scavanging like a vulture. so it doesn't feel right.
cousin C went to see her in the hospital, C's smart & kept it light never really getting into it; just asked "how are you doing, when are you going home, etc". girl is seriously wise beyond her years at times, hopefully i can keep it together tomorrow night.
when B got home i told him everything [that must have been nice to come home to]. later he asked what was the 2nd call, i reminded, then he said "i thought it was a bad thing..." somewhat confused. so i told him "well, yeah.......i might have to go back to work".
i rarely get phone calls at all, to get 3 back to back was unusal.
the first call was from Z's school. i didn't talk about what happened before a few weeks ago. he wanted to play with a girl, she asked him to leave, he refused & punched her in the face. today he argued with another kid about who was first in line & when another girl backed up the other kid, Z spit in her face.
i don't know where or how my child thinks this behavior is acceptable. although i know i shouldn't worry about what people think, i wonder how many people are waiting for me to show up in jackie o sunglasses hiding a shiner? B actually explained to Z tonight about how he (B) doesn't speak to his own father, how he is such a mean person, how he hits people. this story is so old....
the 2nd call was a company i sent an unsolicted resume to. it's a company i worked with when i worked for old boss. i was torn when i sent the resume in the first place, do i want to work with a company that may have the same problems i had with old boss? i'm going in on tuesday "just to chat" not an official interview.
the 3rd actually came in during call 2, it was my mother. i called her back & she told me AO had called & told her nana was in the hospital & for me to call the hospital to see what i could find out. i called the hospital but they wouldn't tell me anything, but i did get to talk with my nana.
she sounded fine, she said her stomach was hurting, she hadn't eaten in 2 days, they were giving her a liquid through her veins & she may need surgery, but for now the pain was gone. i called my AO back, she said something about the possibility of stomach cancer & i got my uncle's number beings the hospital said my uncle was the point of contact. he confirmed the cancer, another biopsy had been done to determine what stage it's in, but the results weren't in yet.
i called my other uncle & he told me depending on the outcome of the biopsy, he wants to bring her to LA for better care. he also told me they (2 uncles) decided it's best to not tell nana she has cancer, they're afraid she'll give up. i think they may be right.
we are headed down tomorrow for my reunion. we planned on having lunch with nana on sat. i called her this morning & left a message that i'd call her back not knowing she was in the hospital. i was supposed to get the sewing machine she wanted me to have; now i feel as though it would be taking, stealing, scavanging like a vulture. so it doesn't feel right.
cousin C went to see her in the hospital, C's smart & kept it light never really getting into it; just asked "how are you doing, when are you going home, etc". girl is seriously wise beyond her years at times, hopefully i can keep it together tomorrow night.
when B got home i told him everything [that must have been nice to come home to]. later he asked what was the 2nd call, i reminded, then he said "i thought it was a bad thing..." somewhat confused. so i told him "well, yeah.......i might have to go back to work".
Friday, September 11, 2009
09/11/09
8 years....unbelievable...
B & I were newlyweds [is that the right term if you elope?]. we'd only lived in the house 6 months. i was working at the soils place & had just finished college. B was working nights & for the most part, we only saw each other on the weekends. we were just learning about house improvement stuff & B was scheduled to go to japan in the summer.
[notice how Z wasn't even a blip on the map, sorry pumpkin!]
maybe i'm out of the loop, but today didn't seem to have the gusto i expected; that makes me a little sad. i expected more hoopla, it wasn't until just now the news showed some 9/11 memorial services, but i hadn't heard about anything beforehand.
i don't want to be morbid, i just don't want to forget or have it forgotten.
B & I were newlyweds [is that the right term if you elope?]. we'd only lived in the house 6 months. i was working at the soils place & had just finished college. B was working nights & for the most part, we only saw each other on the weekends. we were just learning about house improvement stuff & B was scheduled to go to japan in the summer.
[notice how Z wasn't even a blip on the map, sorry pumpkin!]
maybe i'm out of the loop, but today didn't seem to have the gusto i expected; that makes me a little sad. i expected more hoopla, it wasn't until just now the news showed some 9/11 memorial services, but i hadn't heard about anything beforehand.
i don't want to be morbid, i just don't want to forget or have it forgotten.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
what happened to july?
posting has been light, er, none existent, sorry, been busy.
no, that's a lie, just been doing stuff & it's difficult to sit & type, especially beings i'm not even getting paid for it anymore....
B's summer class was cancelled, Z's out of school & i'm unemployed, so we're enjoying the time off & being in the city. B keeps on thinking i'm going to flip beings i'm not working, but i haven't yet. i realize his concern is real, yet he doesn't realize how much easier it is for me here (compared to the desert).
we've been hitting the community pool a lot, even bought a pass; been to the movies a few times (Harry Potter & Aliens in the Attic); located the local farmer's market & been out to the beach a few times. we've also had a few friends drop in from out of town, surprising how many desert folk have been by (the redheaded family of Z, Jeff from the beach, Greg from B's work & we haven't been here a month yet).
B & Z start school at the end of Aug & that's probably when i'll start freaking out (assuming i'm still not working); until then, i'm doing my best to enjoy this & know it's a gift. i do miss all my blogging buddies though & really need to find some time to check in with everyone!
no, that's a lie, just been doing stuff & it's difficult to sit & type, especially beings i'm not even getting paid for it anymore....
B's summer class was cancelled, Z's out of school & i'm unemployed, so we're enjoying the time off & being in the city. B keeps on thinking i'm going to flip beings i'm not working, but i haven't yet. i realize his concern is real, yet he doesn't realize how much easier it is for me here (compared to the desert).
we've been hitting the community pool a lot, even bought a pass; been to the movies a few times (Harry Potter & Aliens in the Attic); located the local farmer's market & been out to the beach a few times. we've also had a few friends drop in from out of town, surprising how many desert folk have been by (the redheaded family of Z, Jeff from the beach, Greg from B's work & we haven't been here a month yet).
B & Z start school at the end of Aug & that's probably when i'll start freaking out (assuming i'm still not working); until then, i'm doing my best to enjoy this & know it's a gift. i do miss all my blogging buddies though & really need to find some time to check in with everyone!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
